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tupac change lyric, jobs, 2 pac change, jim breuer, might, holocaust denial, jokes, news, federal case law, michael chapman, tupac music video, angel, bias, tupac, zoe records, school, andy ackerman, francesca lia block, doom 3, party, | On the by eric gilliland way back, I hit a pot hole. Guess what type of tire takes offense to imperfections in the road? Correct. And if there's one ugly noise you never want to hear from your car, it's the sound of driving on a flat spare tire. Might as well have pulled over and replaced it with a metal Kleenex box.But I didn't. I turned up the radio and kept driving, kind of like by eric gilliland the time I hit a kid in a school crosswalk, accidentally dragging him screaming like a human ragdoll for a good two blocks. I made by eric gilliland it home by the grace of a strong axle, and parked my newly beat up piece of shit Accord just in time to catch my plane (which fortunately didn't have the same types of problems).Fast |
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I went downstairs to the parking garage to leave, and what to my wondering eyes should appear, but a miniature puncture and one flat back right tire. With a futile breath and so little hot air, I knew in a moment it was time for the spare. More rapid than mechanics, my trunk tools they came, and I jacked, and I screwed, and I screamed bias things profane: "Fuck you mother fucker! You cunt-licking spare! On lug nuts! On donuts! No time to explain! To the top of the bias city! For the top of my head! Now drive away! Drive away! Goddammit don't stall!" (The last joke works because it's a 5-speed.)Back story short, I made it in time, which leads me to the real story, where I stop with the rhyme.So Wednesday morning, just hours before my flight to NYC, I had to run one last errand. |
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