[shot of Dave as literary news for grown ups

derek mcgrath, list of proverbs, gossip, tupac amaru, maryland, assata shakur, unreleased, sit 'n' spin, mp3, song lyrics, fatal, sue kolinsky, robert wightman, by katie ford, epidemiology, 2pacalypsenow, videos, tupac amaru shakur, news for grown ups, thug, controversial news, ice t, Man In Truck: Truck driver? I ain't no truck driver. I'm a janitor. That's right, baby, I just bought this truck straight cash. I got cigarettes for me and my family the rest of our literary lives! I'M RICH, BIATCH! [honks horn] Man In Truck: [said at the end of every show] I'M RICH BIATCH! Dylan: [to Wyclef] You too close, mon! [starts choking Wyclef] [jury selection for the Michael Jackson trial] Prosecutor: You know, he's literary been accused of this before. Dave Chappelle: literary So? Some people like their cucumbers pickled. Prosecutor: What? Dave Chappelle: Huh? Prosecutor: What? Dave Chappelle: Huh? Dave Chappelle: Look, man, look. Michael Jackson has many faces - none of them look guilty to me. You gotta look in the eyes, not the noses. Prosecutor: He's been accused of this more than once. Dave Chappelle: So? Some people say that cucumbers taste better pickled.
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[shot of Dave as Prince serving pancakes] Charlie Murphy: [pause, dead serious] Pancakes. Prince: [serving pancakes] Nice game, news for grown ups bitches. [after Dave convinces him not to kill one of his prostitutes] Wayne Brady: You'd better thank Dave news for grown ups Chappelle. Go ahead, thank him. Hooker: Thank news for grown ups you, Dave. I like your show. Dave Chappelle: RUN BITCH! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE, GET SOME HELP! [Wayne Brady takes Dave on a shooting spree] Dave Chappelle: You just shot people, Wayne! Those were *people* you shot! Kent Wallace: In the past few weeks, Clayton Bigsby accepted the fact that he is a black man. And three days ago, he filed for divorce from his wife. When we asked "Why after 19 years of marriage?" He responded, "Because she's a nigger lover." [Black people receive reparations for slavery] Reporter: Sir, now that you've got your check do you plan on quitting your job driving this truck?
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