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| stars, new imperialism, random, tyler sedustine, fatal, review, hate crimes, livingin oblivion (ws), tupac makaveli, harbingerjournal, richard cheney, vice president, tupac music video, | And you haven’t been to Church regularly since you strictly 4 my were 11. So tell me Jason, why should I let you into heaven?” Me: “Well, um, I did give a lot of money to homeless people.” God: [giving me a good look over, conferring with St. Peter, taking a deep breath] “Ok, here’s the deal: 500 years in Purgatory. If you get enough prayers, I’ll knock it down to 400. Take it or leave it.” Me: “We have a strictly 4 my deal!” [Me and strictly 4 my Gary Shandling, who will die only seconds after me on 9/15/08, exchange high fives.] But I’m not stupid when I give either. If I don’t have any change or spare ones at the ready, I’m not about to be stand with a homeless person, routing through my wallet, only to eventually say, “Sorry, I don’t have any change.” |
Best Mature Paysites
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| I give to people less fortunate to cleanse myself of all my sins, which include but are not limited to lying, swearing, wishing death upon enemies and harbingerjournal most women, misogyny, one count of manslaughter, twice masturbating to Dakota Fanning, and hatred toward those less fortunate. My hope is that when I die on September 15, 2008, I will stand before God at the gates of heaven and He’ll say, God: “Let’s see here…on January 12, 1998, harbingerjournal you punched a dog – in the face AND harbingerjournal in his testicles – over a turkey club. On March 22, 2001, you lit your roommate’s car on fire because he beat you at Trivial Pursuit. You spent most of April 2004 on a crime spree in Illinois, Indiana, and Ohio. You have paid for sex on numerous occasions, three times with a man – whether or not it was ‘accidental’, as you claim, is not important to Me. |
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