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It usually goes something like this: “Hey Jay, it’s Karo….uh, and, um, hi to you too, Jocelyn. Hello to the both of you, um, together. Uh whois oh, am I calling too late? Oh man, I’m definitely calling too late. You guys are probably sleeping. Or whois having sex. Oh God I shouldn’t have said that. OK, uh, Jay, just give me a call back. Or Jocelyn you whois can call me back too, I guess. I mean, I was calling for Jay but, you know, I don’t want you to be insulted or anything. You know what? Maybe it’s best if we never speak again.” -I have another friend that recently moved in with her boyfriend. She told me that in order to save time, she and her boyfriend shower together every morning. I told her I had an even better solution. It’s called “move out.” -My friend Jen is an “I love you” friend. Everyone has an “I love you” friend. These are your friends of the opposite sex that insist on saying “I love you” at the end of every single phone conversation thereby forcing you to say it back, usually when you’re standing in front of your girlfriend, mom, or boss, and thus resulting in an uncomfortable moment followed by an equally uncomfortable explanation and finally concluding with the silent thought of how much you hate your “I love you” friend.
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