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All right? How come they never found stories Biggie and Tupac's murderers, but they could arrest O.J. the next day. Nicole Simpson can't rap! [pounds hand on witness stand] Dave Chappelle: stories [shouts] I want justice! You're out of order, Miss! [grabs judge's gavel and begins to pound] Dave Chappelle: [shouts] This whole goddamn court is out of order. Everybody! Prosecutor: [after whispering to her partner] Mr. Chappelle, you're dismissed. Dave Chappelle: [pees on prosecutors while seated at the witness stand] stories And that's from the heart! Tron: Katie has some big ass tit-tays! Silky Johnston: [while looking at a picture of P. Diddy] He looks like Malcolm X before he converted to Islam. Dave Chappelle: [from the announcer's booth after Tiger Woods' acceptance speech after he was picked by the black race during the Racial Draft] I've just received word that Tiger has lost all his endorsements. |
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