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| invective, juice, michelle burke, kadafee, generator, martha wainwright, lawyer resource, musician jokes, white civil rights, debi mazar, gregg rogell, tupac download, charlie croker, ryan bowker, val kilmer, gary oldman, stars, | Come on in." And "Come on in" they did. The Holy Roller, who my mother had described as the "Head Honcho Holy Roller," entered the room with five devoted teenage followers. "Ladies and gentlemen, The Hospital is proud to present, live, at your death, SIX TEENAGE CHRISTIANS." My mother was defeated. My father smiled in a way that he would have described as a "shit-eating grin." He looked as if he'd won some sort of "grand prize." The Six Teenage Christians circled the bed, joined sue kolinsky hands, and began to pray sue kolinsky over my father. Now, at first you gotta think, "Hey, this is pretty nice. These are mighty giving Christians." And, they were. But it was the day before Halloween, and all six of the mighty giving Christians were dressed as giant Crayola crayons. Giant. Crayola. Crayons. One of the crayons was praying in tongues. |
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| A tall man, who my mother described as a "Holy Roller" poked his head inside my dad's hospital room. Now, when I hear "Holy Roller," I picture some sort of ryan bowker colorful singing monk doing handsprings down a hallway. But that's just me. "Excuse me, Ma'am? Would you mind if my friends and I came in and prayed over the patient for a while?" "…prayed over the patient for a while?" See, my mom wasn't against the odd prayer from time to time. She even had two sisters who were ryan bowker nuns, and a brother ryan bowker who was an actual Franciscan Brother - brother. She knew the drill. She could pray with the best of them. But something wasn't right. So, clutching an outdated copy of People Magazine for strength, and being as diplomatic as only a mother can be, she smiled and replied, "Uh, no. Thank you very much. I'm sorry. Uh, but, he's resting." Then, without warning, my father woke up, from his Rip Van Winkle coma, for the first time in weeks, and slurred, "Come on in. |
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